Stereotypes- why do people judge.

 Judging sex based on colour or theme. 

So this post is a bit of a expression of my current feeling really. As trans gay daddies we do not care what biological sex our child are. We raise them to express themselves, have access to any toys or activity that they like and enjoy. Whatever they express interest in we will support and follow. 

We do not stick to certain colours, toys, roles, jobs ect to restrict our children based on their sex assigned at birth. 

Yes while for Ariyah we do use her biological sex and female pronouns. We use the correct terms for her body parts, like vagina. This is for safety and for her to understand anatomy. However as she grows up we will teach her that this does not define her at all. She can choose to wear or do what she is comfortable in and express her own identity. From a very young ages we let her choose what she wanted, from what to wear, toys, and even what she wants to eat out of chooses. Because of this we got to see her own little personality and express unfold. She was happy and independent to make up her own mind. Instead of being like you have to wear pink and dresses or play with dolls because your a girl kind of mind frame. That is not how any child should be raised in my opinion. As it restriction them as well as contributes to society old expections based on sex/gender. Why so many children have anxiety, mental health and do not feel like they fit in. Why bulling happens to those that are deemed different. Instead of embracing uniqueness

Anyways that being said Ariyah is very typically girly same many say. But in other ways not so much. Which is why we love to just see her interests and will support her no matter what. Because while yes she would choose to wear a dress, saying pretty and wow when she has one on. Anything flowery and bright she loves. Yellow seems to be her favourite colour right now. She very caring and sweet. She loves babies and animals. But on the other hand she loves Welly boots, football, running around in mud and climbing. She into Paw patrol and dinasours at the moment. She also seems to make friends or get on with boys rather then girls at baby groups and the park.  She loves to rough play and jump on daddy. But she a daddies (Ben) girl to. So this shows that why do they have to just be one or the other that children and well anyone can like different things at same time and be who they want. As she grows her understanding and own identity will come through and whatever that is it's okay!. 

So along with having had comments about how we raised Ariyah very neutrally. We have comments on this pregnancy and baby. 

Everyone first question is do you know what your having? Not how are you feeling how is baby. We were going to keep in a surprise however it does not matter to us as why make a big deal over it. So we have told people now and il do a whole post on this. But why announce it when it should not be important. 

But we had people say well I know what your having because of the colour and theme we have in babies room. Which I actually laughted at. Because we did babies room before we even found out biological sex. So not sure how they can know from that. Just because of one colour. 

So our theme is moon, stars and clouds which is to honour Nico our son in heaven, our little star. As well as to match Ariyah theme of rainbow as she is our rainbow baby. Again she choose that she likes them. Because of the stars and moon theme we are using night time colours of gold, silver and navy blue. The gold is also because this baby is our pot of gold baby. 

So people who are judging just because there is a bit of blue in the babies room. Really like Ariyah theme was jungle and green, yellow and orange no one said anything about that. But use a bit of navy oh it has to be a boy because girls can not possibly have blue. It is very frustrating when we are getting these comment and trying to bring our babies up to be themselves yet they have people all around them influencing and pushing gender stereotypes on them. 

This post was very much my opinion and in no way to upset anyone or say how they should raise their own children or views they have. Just to highlight our parenting choices and that everyone should respect each other. To spread awareness on how engrained society expections on sex and gender are. Then to challenge people to maybe not jump to conclusion and think about how we view the world. 

If you have any concerns or comments please feel free to comment or message us. Thank you.